Heather Jean Macdonald

1960 - 2007
LocationArbroath
Age47 years
Cause of DeathBrain Haemorrage
Date of Birth02/04/1960
Date of Death08/11/2007
Visitors2,866 since 10/12/2007
Creator

Best Mum in the world! xXxXxXx

On the 4th of November my Mum had a stroke which we found out was the result of a brain hemorrhage, she was rushed to hospital and had an operation to relieve the pressure from her brain. The doctors kept her sedated so she could relax enough to hopefully recover. On Tuesday 6th of November the doctors decided to take her off the sedation and see if she would wake up with some sort of response. This never happened. The doctors told us this was not a good sign and on Wednesday the 7th she had some tests done to see if there was any brain activity, her eyes moved, but this only lasted a few hours. On Thursday these tests were repeated and she failed them all but when they stopped the ventilator she breathed herself, although it wasn't enough to keep her alive, this indicated that she was almost brain dead. Doctors told us it was time to decide what to do, keep her here or let her go, and we all decided that she had been through enough and it would be kinder to let her go to sleep. On Thursday 8th of November me and my Dad sat with her and watched her pass away.

I wonder Mum, are you grieving like us? I hope not because I would hate to think you were hurting as much as me, I hate being in this much pain xXx

It's true what they say, 'You don't know what you've got 'till it's gone'


Today is a perfect day to thank you for a lifetime of loving me, for believeing in me, and for putting my hopes, my dreams and my needs ahead of your own. Mum, you might think that no one noticed, but I want you to know how deeply you are appreciated. I have a thousand memories that I will treasure forever because of the extra effort, the special care, and the love that you always put into all that you do. Thank you for being the very best mum in the world. xxxxxxxxxx

My Mum always said 'I wants don't get'

So Mum, I 'would like' you to come home

I need you so much Mum

Love you to the sky and back xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Gifts

Tributes

Over the past three years so much has happened, not all of it good. If I could change one thing it would be the 4th of November 2007, when you were making your bed, speaking to Coco and all of a sudden got a headache. This is the night you were taken from your family. A family which I hope to have myself one day, with as much love and joy. However you won't be there, so my family will never be complete. I wish I had you for many things, guidance when I have children, or for you sit at the front of my wedding, to help me look at houses when I get a mortgage, to come shopping with me so we could buy outfits for graduation, these are the things we were supposed to do together, but most of all, I want to sit with you and have a cigarette and share a can of coke!!! And just chat about how our day has gone, while reading the herald to each other or sit in the sun together discussing what good friends you have, or watch the film Bones! We must've watched that 100 times!! I miss doing your hair, meeting you down the street when I finish work just to rake in the shops. I miss telling people what me and you have been upto, now I can only speak about what we used to do. I miss having my Mum in my giving me direction in life. I need you. There are so many things we never got the chance to do. It hurts as much now as it did when I watched you take your last breath. I was screaming inside, and still am, for this not to be happening. It's not often I cry, but when I do I can't stop. I will always love you Mum, always, as much today as when you were alive, I hope to see you soon in my dreams as it's be a while xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Carly Macdonald (Daughter)

May 17, 2010

Hi Mum, so much is going on just now. Me and Vikki have our own flat, it's lovely :) I think you would like it! I'm still working a lot and also at Uni, which I'm starting to struggle with, there's just so much going on around me that Uni seems to be the last thing on my mind, but I'm going to stick in and give it my best shot! A lot has happened lately that's hurt me deeply, things that I'm struggling with. Some people in this world are not like you were, kind and caring, they are just out to hurt people, and don't care how they make people feel. I'm sure you understand. Nannie and Grandad are doing well, just back from a weekend away where they celebrated their golden wedding together. Jackie and Laura are fine also, it's Jackie's birthday tomorrow, we will probably go and see her on Monday night. Vikki is fine but finding it hard to understand some people's actions. She has her work night out tonight, mines is next Friday it should be good fun. I'm off to bed now Mum, I hope I see you in my dreams, love you millions and millions xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Carly Macdonald (Daughter)

December 5, 2009

Well Mum, I have so much to tell you! First of all as you know it was my birthday the other day, I spent it with the people I love the most, I hope you were with us at lunch time. Also I got accepted into Robert Gordons university to study for a social work degree, I am so proud to tell you that because I know that no one in the world would be prouder than you!!! I start on the 23rd of September, so I'll have enough time to move up to Aberdeen when I get back from the caribbean! I'm having a BBQ tomorrow hopefully it'll be nice weather for it! Dad's moved to Spain and we don't hear from him much... won't say anymore on that subject. Me and Vikki are getting on much better now, what I mean by that is she does what I say haha only kiddin! We're also having a little party next weekend for Vikki's birthday which should be good fun! I hope you like the garden, we have a washing line eventually!!! I'm so excited, God listen to me...I'm turning into you!!! haha only joking I'm proud to be like you!! Me and Sam speak about you loads, I wish you could've met her she's a great girl you would've liked her, you liked everyone but she's so like me you woulda had to love her haha! Her Mum and Dad and Elisabeth have been so good to me even though I've not known them for long! Nannie was 70 the other day I hope I gave her the right gift!! I seen Bryce a few weeks ago, you would never recognise him he's turned into a proper young man now and it probably as tall as you! What a bunch of good looking lads Gill and Steven have! They miss you so much. You'll be glad to hear I have little/nothing to do with anyone in Kintore or where ever it is anymore, not after the way a certain person spoke to me, if you were here I know you wouldn't have stood for it, and I'll be damned if I was gonna put up with it!!! No one speaks to me like that, I'm a good person and don't deserve to be spoken to like dirt, neither did you I just wish someone had spoken up for you before you died, like Dad, hmm won't say anymore on that. Right mother... gonna go now, it's 3.25am and I've still got about 1000 words of an essay to write before I go to bed, might just do an all nighter and stay in bed all day Sunday when I'm hungover!! Ohh the joys of being a student. Love you loads and loads and loads more than that night night sleep tight don't let the bed bugs bite sweet dreams xxxxxxxxx

Carly Macdonald (Daughter)

April 18, 2009

For my best friend, I miss you so much

Heather when we went to your graveside yesterday. It felt like you were there as we all bantered back and forth and sorted your flowers. Sorry about the state of them, I did run around trying to find what I was looking for and they still ended up looking like a dog's dinner. I hadf it in my head what I wanted and it just didn't work. You know what we all really want. It's not about poxy flowers or fancy gravestones. It's you and if we can't have you back in our lives we try and compinsate. Heather I would never go back to that place again if I could be sure you could be with me whenever I need a blether or a moan or just to tell you how much I miss you. I was never one for lots of friends, all through my life I was happy with just a few. That's all I ever needed. Cos good ones are special and make up in quality for all the superficial ones. However when you lose them you are left with a enormous hole like a big wound constantly picked, never to heal (thought you would like that example)Right now I feel my wound is so deep it will never heal.

I couldn't sleep last night, I dont know if it was the battered smokie or the fact it was your anniversary and yet we barely talked about you, maybe it felt like a normal day and you were there too joining in, I doubt it if it was a normal day you would have had the floor and would have led the conversation. My tongue has only stepped back and rested for one other and that is you. My boss says he doesn't know anyone that can talk so much as me, he never met you.

Heather please don't stay silent, it is what I miss the most. Thank you for coming through at the sitting and thank you for watching over Brian and Vikki and Carly. Thank you for coming to Ally the other night. He says he wasn't sure if it was old memories he dreamt but I know you were there. Please keep him in on the right path, don't forget you are his godmum and now you can be his guardian angel.

Our Niki could do with some tlc too. You know you were not an Auntie to him but a second mum. You made him feel safe. Dean "copes" but don't we all, he's just better at hiding it or holding it together.

What I really want to say is I miss you, I accept you are there to stay but never be far from the ones that love you. Say hello to mum

Mhairi xxx

Mhairi (Best Friend)

November 9, 2008

Rememberance

Hello

Its My Dads Rememberance Today & After reading your tribute to your mum I had to leave you a message, What a lovely tribute it touched my heart,

Thinking off your mum & the loving family she left behind,

Karen x

Karen Robinson

November 8, 2008

Love Always

Hi Mum, well I've not written here for a while so have a few things to tell you. I was accepted into college again this year so it's off to uni next year hopefully, I start my placement next week at a place called Beach Hill in Forfar it should be good. I got my new bed, the one we picked out together, it's really nice and finishes off my room eventually! I've also started speaking to Steph again, and I absolutly adore Nori-Jane, I wish you could've met her she's absolutly beautiful! She's so full of smiles, that's her 7 months now but she's still a small baby, I can't wait to spoil her! Not sure if I told you but I've booked a holiday to the Domincan Republic for next August with Kirsten and Sarah it should be good, nice and hot! Princess our puppy is coming on well but still a few small things we need to train her to do! Right Mum I'm really tired tonight so gonna go off and get to bed in a bit. Love you loads, forever and always xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Carly Macdonald (Daughter)

October 12, 2008

Time Goes By

Hi Heather, time seems to be passing by at an alarming rate these days. I am getting help now, and I am feeling much better about things, mum and dad are okay. Strange how it was difficult to visit the cemetery after Irene died, but I've been there to see your grave several times now and I feel a strange sense of peace when I'm there, but it still breaks my heart ...... Time goes on, seems getting my tattoo was a good thing to do, I am keeping my eye on the girls!!! Love to you Heather x x x x

Jacs ((sis))

July 20, 2008

Hi Mum, happy birthday! I wish you were here so much with me so I could give you a cuddle and spoil you on this special day. You would've been 48 today, far too young to be away from me Vikki and Dad. I would do anything to have you back, even just for 5 minutes to tell you how much I love you. Thiking of you always xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Carly Macdonald (Daughter)

April 2, 2008

Thinking of you today

Only One Mother
★*•.¸. ♥ ¸.•*★
Hundreds of stars in the pretty sky,
Hundreds of shells on the shore together,
Hundreds of birds that go singing by,
Hundreds of birds in the sunny weather.
★*•.¸. ♥ ¸.•*★
Hundreds of dewdrops to greet the dawn,
Hundreds of bees in the purple clover,
Hundreds of butterflies on the lawn,
But only one mother the wide world over.
★*•.¸. ♥ ¸.•*★

Lots of love to you today. Thinking of you. Thank you for all your support. It means so much.

Lisa xxx

Lisa Osbourne (Friend)

March 2, 2008

Carly

Please call me when things get really bad or just for a blether, it breaks my heart to read your letters to Heather. It hurts like losing her all over again. Sally says any time you want some company she'll come and stay over. Just ask.

Mhairi (Best Friend)

February 23, 2008
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